chased

i have trouble falling asleep... lately i've been having very broken sleep, so much that i really believed my dream was real. i had to check the time and date to remember it wasn't.

and for the last couple of weeks, i've been running from people. i don't know why i'm running... but i have to run. i don't like being chased in my dreams... heck.. i don't like being chased in RL (that's 'real life', folks).

but my reoccurring dream.. nightmare... is ... abstract. 

it's made of feelings more than it is anything i can touch/hold.

so it's something like this: 

i'm in a black empty space. i'm not really standing on anything.. just an invisible plane.

i see a cube. curious, i go to grab it. and as i do that.. i either shrink smaller, or the cube gets way too big for me to reach. like Alice in Wonderland.

sometimes, i want to climb it, but i slip.. and the cube was tiny, all along.

there are spheres, too. and it's just the same idea - perception is everchanging. 

sometimes i get sucked in, i fall in between the cracks, or inside the ball, and the ball shrinks.

i'm suffocated.

this dream makes me scared.

i'm confused - why are the shapes small when i could swear it was taller than myself? am i being lied to?

everytime i try to do something, i fail.

it doesn't bother me that i'm alone.

what bothers me is that everything i do is... useless. but i can't stop.

chasing & running.

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